Submitted by Frank from the US. Actual comments from US travel agents:

A woman called and asked, “Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to who?” I said, “No, why do you ask?” She replied, “Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?” After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it” (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

I just got off the phone with a man who asked, “How do I know which plane to get in?” I asked him what exactly he meant, which he replied, “I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them.”

A woman called and said, “I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola on one of those computer planes.” I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, “Yeah, whatever.”

A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. “Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.” I double-checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, “Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express.”

A woman called to make reservations; “I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York.” The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent said, “Are you sure that's the name of the town?” “Yes, what flights do you have?” replied the customer. After so me searching, the agent came back with, “I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere.” The customer retorted, “Oh don't be silly, everyone knows where it is. Check your map!” The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, “You don't mean Buffalo, do you?” “That's it! I knew it was a big animal!”

Time Zone: CDT (GMT -5)

Airport Code: ORD

Customer service number: 800 832-6352

Distance from city: 18 miles (29km)

Terminal 1 is for United and United Express flights plus Lufthansa departures.

Terminal 2 airlines include Air Canada, America West, Continental, Northwest, United and US Airways.

Terminal 3 airlines include Alaska, American and Delta.

Terminal 5 is the international terminal for most non-US airline departures and all international arrivals

Chicago O Hare is named after Lieutenant Edward O'Hare who was a military hero, and flew planes in the Navy during WW2. He was awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor in 1942.

The largest US troop and cargo carrying airplane, the Douglas C-54, was built at a factory on the site and the base, known then as Orchard Field, which was almost entirely then used by the military. When the war ended, Chicago’s city Municipal Airport, later to become Midway Chicago quickly established itself as the world's busiest civil aviation operation. A far-sighted City Council saw the potential for air travel and decided a second major facility would be needed so in 1946 they bought Orchard Field from the US government together with another 7,000 acres next door. Three years later $2.4 million was spent on acquiring more land and Orchard Field was re-named in honour of O'Hare.

The airport was already busy before it was officially opened to domestic commercial flights in 1955, but Midway was still the star attraction until 1962 when all scheduled operations were transferred from Midway to O'Hare. When the airport was officially dedicated the following year, President John F. Kennedy said, “it could be classed as one of the wonders of the modern world”. He was right in one sense because O'Hare preserved its title as 'World's Busiest' for over 30 years until it was overtaken by Atlanta in 1998.

Source: http://www.airwise.com/

My partner and I (aged 55 and 65) went RTW for 12 months to April 2002. She has written a book on it but is looking for a publisher. I went to internet cafes to maintain a long journal. So rather than travellers' tales here are some notes on how we did it. The RTW deal was from Star Alliance, giving us 12 months, 15 stops and 39000 miles. A couple of times when in dispute with an airline the Alliance link was useful. Their miles include overland legs which seems unfair but it is still good value. They allow backtracking, which we needed for India to China.

We flew to Brazil for two lazy weeks to get over the strain of preparations, then to Lima. We took buses – we avoided 'luxury' or 'tourist' buses -round Peru and despite being told it was impossible found a cheap way to Macchu Picchu. Three-day trips to Colca Canyon and to the Peruvian Amazon jungle. Bus and boat (aided by the Bolivian Navy!) to cold La Paz then bus on 'the most dangerous road in the world' to lovely Coroico. Flew to Costa Rica, which seemed very wealthy and grotesquely American!

But we had a wonderful time there – eco-tourism on the Caribbean coast and in the cloud forest. I wrote a report on working conditions on the banana plantations. Then buses through sad Nicaragua, tough Honduras (staying with the Garifuna) and Guatemala with its staggering range of wealth. We were in luxury after three months of back packers' hotels and crowded but fascinating bus journeys. Then we bought a car in Florida and eventually sold it in British Columbia. (One could write a book this, as on each leg of the journey.) This was not as easy as it sounds – big problems with driver's licence and insurance. But surmountable. Boat and bus to Houston BC. Strange coming back to sophistication a few days after 9/11, a different world. Hawaii then fabulous Tonga. Real bliss as the only visitors on an idyllic island, and time to think. Here my partner discovered the magic of snorkelling.

NZ was surprisingly far nicer than expected, Sydney also amazes. We were kept busy there and in Canberra and Melbourne giving talks. Thailand where we made lasting friends, one a young man not half way through 25 years imprisonment for drug smuggling. Don’t even think about it! Interesting to contrast the type of tourists here with those in S America. Almost a different breed. So to the jewel. Three months in India lived up to all my hopes and dreams. A stopover in steamy sophisticated Singapore (the night time zoo worth a visit) thence to Beijing, and onto the trans-Asia train with stops including three weeks in Mongolia (hiring a jeep to traverse the Gobi), Siberia (Lake Baikal), Moscow and glorious St Petersburg.

Stockholm was refreshing and spring time in England utterly delightful. Total cost was less than £4,000 on fares, plus £400 a week rent we got on our London homes. We ate local workers' food. We often stayed in people's homes – fellow Quakers, a hosting organisation, far flung family and friends. Otherwise in the better rooms in cheap hotels. Motels (except some on Route 66) have no character but are great value. Or ashrams. The only problematic visa was that for Russia, though others such as India and China needed some care. I was surprised to find one of the most irksome problems was telephoning – one needs to see if mobiles can be adapted cheaply in each region. Only disappointments: despite three weeks in most places we usually seemed to be in a hurry, and sadly I lost several sets of slides.

Essentials include up-to-date Guides. We used Footprint guides for Latin America because it avoids having lots of volumes; and for India as well as Lonely Planet there and everywhere else. “Road Trip USA” for the side roads. Take both Visa and MasterCard (and Maestro if possible) as many areas take only one or the other. We had all the jabs recommended except expensive encephalitis. We never resolved all the arguments for and against anti-malaria tablets, and if so which ones. But insect repellent from day 1, and a hat if you are bald like me. I had to have scalp pre-cancer treatment on return. I was supplied with and shown how to use self-catheterisation by the NHS. Never had to do it but without it I would not have dared go to Tonga, or deep into the Gobi.

Medically we had very few problems, tummy bug twice, and chest complaints in the Andes. I got shingles when in Thailand but was easily able to get powerful drugs (for £50 – a fortune), which knocked it out. But we had quite a few strains from lugging our packs (and from 3 days meditating cross legged in a Buddhist temple!) We both had Karrimor wheeled rucksacks and seldom had to hump them. My advice – just DO IT! Don't worry about food and accommodation and robbery.

Ignore travel mags and ads. They make it scary so you'll use their expensive services. Just GO! Details on the web site (at http://home.clara.net/spetter/sp/, but sadly I don't have time and space to mention our lovely hosts and the travellers and locals we met. To contact Stephen for any hints or tips, please e-mail him on: spetter@clara.net

It has certainly been an interesting month here in Mikindani, and also in Dar es Salaam. One of Trade Aid’s new ideas for Mikindani is to start up a local group who can produce Batik T-shirts. But what is this I hear you ask. Batik T-shirt printing is the dying of a T-shirt with certain areas left undyed, this enables you to produce a variety of patterns.

It was at the beginning of December that the journey up to Dar began, at the oh so sociable hour of four o’clock in the morning. After a back breaking sixteen hours in one of the Trade Aid Landrovers, being bounced and battered along a Tanzanian “road” we finally arrived in Dar Es Salaam, oh what a relief. After a day to settle in, and make extensive use of the bar and air conditioning at the Seaman’s mission [where we were staying] it was down to work. My brief was to look into the process of Batik T-shirt production, and to see if it would be feasible in Mikindani.

The Batik T-shirt printing takes place in an indoor market/shopping centre where the products are also sold. There I met the head of the organisation that prints the T-shirts and the head of production, who oversees the entire process.

The process begins when the parts of the T-shirt that are not to the dyed are covered in a special sort of wax. This can be applied through two methods, either using a brush or a wooden print. As far as Mikindani and the Boma is concerned it is my opinion that the print method would be the best, as it would produce work for the local carpenters.

Once the wax has been applied and dried the T-shirt is then dyed. A mixture of hot and cold water (17 litres) dye, caustic soda and sodium powder are then mixed together in a stone bath. The T-shirt is then repeatedly lifted in and out of this mixture until the dye has fully soaked into the material. After which it is then taken out of the water and hung to dry. The wax then has to be removed; this is done by placing the T-shirt into a vat of boiling water, where it is then stirred around until all of the wax has been removed. The T-shirt is then finished and can either be worn, or more colours can be applied by using the wax to cover the previous dyed areas and any areas that need to be left clear. This should certainly prove to be something that Trade Aid and the Boma can make good use of, and it should also benefit the local groups who can get involved.

For more information on the work carried out by Trade Aid in Tanzania, see their website www.mikindani.com

Anna and Magda wrote in asking for help with voluntary placements in Australia: we are two girls living in Germany, age 19, just finished our A-levels (Advanced school leaving certificate). Our reason for writing is, that we would like to do a voluntary practical year in Australia. WE would be very grateful if you could give us further help in this. Best regards Anna and Magda.

The Beetle responds: As you are both under 30, you are most likely eligible to apply for a working visa in Australia. So maybe if you contact the Australian embassy in your country, they can advise you about this. Roughly speaking, you are not allowed to do a “professional” job, so you are only allowed to do casual work such as potato, fruit picking or short term work. No one piece of work can be over 3 months either.

The Beetle suggests that you search on the internet using the words “voluntary work Australia”. This is a good site to start with: Volunteer Search in addition, the April 2002 Globetrotter e-newsletter 2002 had an article by conservationvolunteers email conservationvolunteers about conservation volunteer opportunities. There’s also always the WWOOF organisation, see: Wwoofing, which caters for people who want to work on organic farms. There’s also:

Working Holiday MakersAustralian Department of Immigration and Multicultural Affairs.

ATCV (Australian Trust for Conservation Volunteers) accepts Australian and foreign volunteers for a wide range of conservation projects throughout Australia.

Australian Jobs Guide by Nomads World features visa information, job packages, agencies and a harvest guide for fruit picking/harvest work.

Diving in Australia has an employment database.

Pelican Point Windsurfing in W. Australia has employment opportunities for instructors.

The Cape Tribulation Tropical Research Station accepts volunteers for conservation projects.

Travel Jobs Network, a service for Australian and New Zealand job seekers.

TNT Magazine has an excellent section on finding temporary work in Australia.

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The Beetle received an e-mail from the parent of a college student, studying in L.A. They wanted to know where their daughter and two friends could go on an inexpensive package for their spring break April 12-18, 2003. Hawaii maybe?

The Beetle agreed that Hawaii, (but not Oahu – which can be a little touristy and expensive, when the other islands have far more to offer) would be a great option. It is possible to buy reasonably priced fly drive holidays around the Hawaiian islands, where our reader’s daughter and friends could share a room at a very nice hotel at a good price. With only 6 days, I would recommend either the Big Island alone or alternatively split between Kauai and the Big Island. If a car and swish hotel is too expensive, then it is possible to find moderately priced accommodation on the Big Island, so this should cut the cost, but a car is definitely a must!